Saturday, January 14, 2012

Losing it and Getting it Back

So yesterday I woke up just like any other day at 5:30 am, I know I am crazy. I got ready for work, got Landon ready for school and left the house. I was even running early. I dropped Landon at school and then headed to work. I have started my daily prayer time with God in the time from Landon's school to work. It's my time away from everything else, my time with God to let him know my reservations, my fears, my goals, my dreams, my time to spend pouring it all out to a God who knows me better than I know myself. As I hit the corner and started to pray I lost it. I mean snot running down my face crying lost it! Jon has been gone for the past 11 days. I was thinking about how my life has changed so much in such a short amount of time. I miss Jon a lot. More than I ever thought possible. I thought about all the time we have spent together just me and him. I miss everything about my husband, and don't even get me talking about falling asleep. I sleep on his side of the bed, my only solace at night. I was crying and sad, but at the same time I felt God telling me it was okay to lose it as long as I got it back. So after work I went to school to take a test and my Mom was going to my sister's house with Landon so that meant I would have to be in the house all by myself. So I did what anyone did I called my friend, Serinia. You know those people you meet at a certain time in your life and you say how did I not know you before?! Okay, she is one of those people. She is always there helping me when I need an early morning babysitter, a fellow home improvement hand, and of course when cookies are involved. (She makes the most amazing chocolate chip and oatmeal chocolate chip cookies!) We went out to dinner and I started to feel normal again. Almost, then I got home and all the feelings came rushing back as I attempted to fall asleep... So today I volunteered with Share Our Strength's Cooking Matters Program. It was such an awesome experience. I learned a lot along with the students from the Chef instructor...

We made some pretty awesome pancakes too...

I then got to help a team with some amazingly healthy turkey tacos. I was so proud of them they did a great job!

Overall it was the best volunteer experience I have ever had. It got me to thinking. I may have lost it on Friday, but through the people God put in my life and the ability to focus on others instead of myself I got it back. So if you are looking for a way to get past something or you just feel like you need a pick me up focus on the needs of others and volunteer you time. I can't think of a better way to get back everything that you thought you lost. Because that's just it, you may have never lost it. God just might be holding it for insurance that you will find your way back to Him to claim it. So if you are looking for way to get involved and don't know where to start take a look at my brother's video blog about his upcoming triathlon for leukemia.

Happy Volunteering!!

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